what have i done dear Lord. i made a choice. i hope it's not one which i would regret in life later. both decisions are hard to make. and yet as it finalled, it has such an impact on me. hurts like shat. why, dear God. show me if this is your plan. for me to complete and gain whatever i can within this period so we can come back together. i pray for you to guard our hearts and stand up to the test. that you help him tide through everything in life without me around. You reunited us was the best plan for me, now that i need to learn all that i can and do what i want in life, Lord i pray for your assistance in standing up to this test to realise and see things in life that will help me to grow in whichever way you want me to.

Lord, hold me in your embrace and fill me with shalom peace that i will not feel the immense pain that i have to endure for my choice; aswell as his.

i love you.